Self doubt

This morning I woke with a great deal of self doubt weighing on me.  Usually I post uplifting positive posts to offer help, support, and encouragement, well I'll get there so just stay tuned. 

This week has been full of challenges and pitfalls, but lets consider the positives first.  My car has been repaired and I'm driving her again after two weeks with a borrowed vehicle.  My low back is better after I threw it out last week.  The weather this week has been spring like after such a cold winter snow storm last week.  Most importantly, I connected with the Clinton's Women's Outreach Ministry this week, and that is a wonderfully powerful gift and blessing!  These alone should have sustained me, but instead I wavered and started doubting.  My pitfalls where overwhelming and came to a point I felt enough is enough this morning.   First, my original website has done away with the option to leave comments on blogs.  It's not that anyone is leaving comments but I didn't want them to take that option away if someone should feel compelled to reach out someday.  Second, a friend suggested I start posting on blogger (I do like this set up) and that we could move my website location here without any trouble.  Nice idea in theory but technology is never easy.  In some areas you enter my original website and bam you are directed smoothly and effortlessly right here, but this is not working in all areas of the web.  Third, blogger does not offer the option to subscribe to updates on new blogs, so I hope that eventually those who want updates will reach out directly.  I do appreciate that idea, because it allows me to personally reach out to those wanting my blogs, I like that personal touch.  Fourth, and this is the one that brought me all the way down, I was bombarded this week with business reps reaching out to sell me packages that could help me grow my business.  It's bad enough when it's strangers, but to also have family members attempting to recruit you for their company, enough is enough.   I have lost count how many times I've heard, "What's the biggest obstacle you face in growing your business".  With all these issues coming at me last night I reached a point of I'm done.  I thought it was time to just unplug and immerse myself in a few hours of a favorite TV show.  Thinking this morning I'd be good and ready to take on the world once again.

No such luck, instead I awoke wondering why am I doing all this.  I could just give in and walk away.  Help those friends who seek me out, but beyond that what's the point.  I considered my current situation, looked at where I was in comparison to where I want to be, I allowed myself to feel each emotion and accept if for what it was.  Then I started praying and listening to God.  Listening to what I already know, and heard His reminders.  It's not about where I am in my business, it's about where I am in my life.  It's about using every thing I have learned, to do what God created me to do, help others!

So it is with great determination that I take that moment of self doubt and I am turning it into self motivation.  I will not give up and walk away, I am needed in this world.  I took that selfie as a reminder to myself, it says no matter what I've got this, I may have doubts along the way and I may waver,  I am well aware that there is something more that God wants me to do and learn.  So I will continue to trust in God's plan and His perfect timing.